I haven't posted in a few days because I'm even getting tired of hearing myself go on and on about how hard this is when really it's not that hard. The hard part is the self deprecation because so often I find myself going back to my old ways. Such as, if I'm alone and no one sees me eat this it doesn't count! Or the other day I got a bag of plain m&m's. I don't even really like them but I thought, I've been dying for chocolate and if I get some I don't really like it will be easy for me to stop. I looked at the serving size and calories on the back of the bag and thought I could get away with it because I had enough room left to add a few more calories that day. I laid on my bed and counted out the serving size. The colors of new m&m's are so pretty, so bright. I like making little faces and traffic lights with them while they are waiting their turn to be devoured. I was lining them up two by two when I noticed I didn't have any yellow ones to complete my pattern. So I dumped out the bag til I found enough yellow ones to continue the pattern. After I dumped out the bag there were a few that didn't fit the pattern so I ate them. Then I started eating my beautifully lined up m&m's two by two. Seriously, after the first 5 they're not even that good. But they were all laid out so pretty so I ate them. All of them. The whole bag. Sometimes I think I'm hopeless.

Anyway......I'm not going to reach my goal of 210 by Valentines Day. I've set a new goal to weigh 205 by St Patricks Day. I only have to lose 4 pounds a week and once again I really think I can reach this one. No really, I really do....