:)

I haven't blogged about dieting for a long time. I got tired of listening to myself whine. But I really feel like this is my best outlet and if you don't want to read it just tolerate this blog. Today is Thursday, my favorite show is on tonight and my fav rapper is getting out of prison! My brother called me today just because he cares about me. Yesterday Mike made me dinner and dessert. The house payment went through, which at first was a bummer cause it means I'm broke now but then I realised oh yeah I get to keep the house Yay! I love my friends that have come to mean so much to me and my family that are such a support to me. The weather is fabulous right now. I just want to hold on to all these things so tight because I know such happiness can only be followed by opposition. Does my fear of opposition invite opposition? Do I search for things to worry about at such a peaceful time for me?

Anyway about the diet. I hate to say it but I gained 18 stinkin pounds back. It's ok though. I found the diet my trainer (Rayya) made for me at the first of the year when I was doing so well. I'm going to stick to that til I'm back on track. Mike is doing so good on his diet I told him the other day I feel like I am the devil on his shoulder always trying to bring him down. I had a bad day Monday and begged him to take me to Charritos for taquitos. After we ate I felt so bad I cried because I'm the only reason he ate there. Those taquitos were DELICIOUS, but the taste did not make up for the guilt I felt after. Today my medical assistant brought eclairs and my receptionist brought cheesecake pumpkin pie. The Brittany Spears song keeps running through my mind. "Iam stronger than yesterday..." and I really am. It helps that I have a little vision of Mandy singing and dancing to that song in my head. I wish I could program that song for every time I open the fridge door!